


John: Contemplate.

by the_foxiest_box



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Erotic Dream (mentioned), F/M, This is just borderline mature, but not enough to be rated M, happy grimdorks day everyone., in which John is a hormonal teenager, quick fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-29
Updated: 2014-03-29
Packaged: 2018-01-17 11:04:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 983
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1385281
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_foxiest_box/pseuds/the_foxiest_box
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You dreamed of Rose Lalonde again last night.</p>
            </blockquote>





	John: Contemplate.

**Author's Note:**

> Anyway I wrote something short since today is basically grimdorks day. This is based off of [give-me-all-your-striders](http://give-me-all-your-striders.tumblr.com/) lovely [artwork. ](http://give-me-all-your-striders.tumblr.com/post/80731761390/just-a-thingy-idk-i-tried-doing-a-watermark-i)
> 
> There are a FUCK TON of questions asked out of dialogue which is huge no no i think, but I tried my best to make it work! Let me know how I did.
> 
> Anyhoo! This is basically in which John asks himself every question he can think of, and is a very hormonal teenager. 
> 
> There is minor talk of erotic dreams just fyi

 

            "John, get up!" Jade hurls a pillow at your head, "Happy birthday, you big dweeb." 

            "Give me a few more minutes..." You're too lazy to open your eyes. 

            She scoffs before leaving the small room, "I already gave you an hour! And put some pants on, you're gross!" 

            You lift your head to respond irritably, "I don't wear pants to bed, weirdo!" 

            Your name is JOHN EGEBRT, and today is your SIXTEENTH BIRTHDAY. To be truthful, you had no idea it was your birthday until Jade informed you so. You rub the slick drool off of your mouth and collapse into the sofa once again. For the first time in your life, you really rue your birthday - it means you'd actually have to get up today rather than sleeping the whole day. Jade has been badgering you about your sleeping habits recently, and it drives you up the wall. Reluctant to get out of your nest, you press your face into the nearest cushion and give a heaving groan of doom. 

            You dreamed of Rose Lalonde again last night.

            As usual, you don't remember much, but you remember her blond hair, her purple eyes, and how pretty you thought her face was. This was about the fiftieth time you've dreamed of her since getting on this ship, you're sure of it. To much of your shame, you'll admit that a few of those dreams have been less than innocent. Just the thought of those dreams made you nervous and confused. It was certainly apparent that you'd hit puberty, and had become quite hormonal, as any teenage boy should at your age. You felt disgusting and repulsive after waking up, drenched in your own stale sweat on those mornings, still hot with lingering arousal. Luckily, this is the kind of info you can keep to yourself. You are very relieved that Jade isn't a mind player.

            But why? Why Rose? It had been nearly two years since you knelt down to kiss her cold and dead lips. The only reason you did that was to bring her back. So, why is she still on your mind, even after all this time? Suddenly, you have more questions than you could fill the whole ship with. You wonder, does she think of you...? 

            "John?" You recognize Jade's voice through your clouded thoughts. 

            You respond with another frustrated grunt, "Hang on! Geez, cut me some slack!"

            You wonder if Rose misses you. Do you miss her? Judging by how much you've thought of her in the past year or so, you most definitely do. You're going to look forward to seeing her again in about a year. But will she look different? Will you hug her when you see her again? The two of you haven't made much contact since being separated - perhaps you'd grown apart. Does she even like you? For whatever reason, you really want to think she does. Does... she even like boys? 

            Why the hell are you thinking of all this!?

            You want to scream all of these ridiculous thoughts away. You are plagued by thoughts you shouldn't be thinking. It's almost as if- no.

            _Do you love her?_

            You roll onto your back with a flop as you remember when you first met Rose. Oh, how awkward that had been. For one thing, she had gone grimdark, creating an unnecessary language barrier between the two of you. Additionally, you were incredibly nervous and most likely looked like a total dorkaholic in front of her. And lastly, the whole endeavor ended with your mutual deaths. The end. You wonder if she remembers that conversation... Did she _want_ to marry you? Would Rose be okay with marrying a guy like you? You scrunch up your face and smack both hands over your eyes. Stop asking so many questions, John!

            _Does Rose wonder about these things too?_

            You take your time lifting your torso off of the couch. You feel heavy today. Your mouth opens wide to release a much-needed yawn, and you rub your face vigorously as if it were possible to wipe the sleep away. Your gaze meets the wall opposite of you as you find that you are alas, too groggy to stand up still.

            _What if you married Rose?_

            When she'd responded to you in Eldrich tongue after you clumsily brought up the subject of matrimony not long ago, she didn't seem to protest. In fact... had she smiled at you? You swear she did. So... what _would_ happen if you married Rose? What if you started dating...? With the subject of romancing Rose fresh in your mind, you find your ears heating up just slightly. You don't think you'd mind dating Rose, and you surely wouldn't mind kissing her again... Hopefully she'll be alive if there's a next time.

            But... _what if you broke her heart...?_

            You don't want to break Rose's heart. That's the last thing you'd ever want to do. You actually feel your heart drop to the pit of your stomach just thinking of making Rose cry. What would Dave and Jade say? You're quite sure that you'd never be able to look Dave in the eye again if you hurt his sister. 

            You'll admit that that you'd really like to take her out, despite the risk of putting a few new cracks in her already heavy heart. Maybe after this hellhole is all cleared up you will... Maybe you'd take her to a nice bookstore, or buy her some ice cream. Maybe you'd even hold her hand or... kiss her. Goddamn, your ears are quick to turn red. Just why the hell are you thinking of Rose in these ways? Why are you so blushy whenever you think of Rose?

            And that's when a single question floats back into view.

            _Are you in love with Rose Lalonde?_

You swallow and narrow your vision in realization, "Fuck..."


End file.
